One of the most significant obstacles we face in urban youth work is addressing the challenges faced by the parents of the youth we serve. It's no secret that many of these parents are battling significant adversities: working multiple jobs, coping with mental health issues, living with unresolved trauma, and more. These realities can leave little time and energy for parental engagement at home, making our role even more critical.
First, let’s acknowledge an important truth: these parents aren’t just statistics; they’re real people facing overwhelming odds. They're often doing the best they can under tough circumstances, frequently on their own. As youth workers, it’s easy to feel frustrated or helpless when we see the impact of these challenges on the young people we care about. We tend to place blame, get defensive, and increase the distance in our relationships with parents, especially when we perceive neglect, harmful behavior, and lack of motivation. But here is where we need to step up and lean in, not step back.
Our calling is to be the bridge—between hope and despair, between what is and what could be. Think about how Jesus reached out to those who were overlooked or underestimated. He didn't stand back; He reached out His hand. He saw the person, not just the problem. That’s our model. When we combine a relational approach with an awareness of the root systemic issues causing these problems, our efforts will be far more effective than merely addressing the symptoms.
So, how do we support these families effectively and practically? It starts with compassion and understanding. We can’t offer real help without first genuinely understanding the difficulties they face. This means listening—really listening—to their stories. It also means being ready to provide practical support, whether that’s connecting them to mental health resources, offering flexible program schedules, or simply being a consistent, caring presence in their lives.
Where I have observed lasting change is when parents are empowered. This could look like hosting workshops that fit into their schedules or offering resources that equip them to manage stress and trauma. Remember, empowerment is about adding strength to existing capabilities, recognizing the resilience that’s already there. Empowering parents is an overwhelming task. It really is. When I try to do this alone, I almost always fail. I need my family of fellow youth workers and leaders to learn from and lean on for encouragement. We don’t have to do this alone!
Students also have a part to play in empowering their parents. When we equip students with social, emotional, and spiritual awareness tools, they can not only apply them to their own lives but also share them with their parents. Parents have shared that they have been inspired by the change they see in their kids to better their own lives! While students should not bear the burden of changing their parents, they can be encouraged to share their journey of making positive decisions and curating healthy habits with their parents.
In all of this, the greatest gift we can give is to create a community of support, a place where these parents feel seen and valued. Let’s be clear about our purpose: We’re not here to judge, but to journey with them, to advocate for them and their children.
And to you, the youth workers in the trenches, know this: Your work matters immensely. The challenges are real, but so are the opportunities for transformation. Every act of compassion, every session you plan, all the asset mapping and root cause analysis exercises, every time you choose to see the potential in a young person, you are planting seeds of change that can last a lifetime.
IG :@aimrightministries & @jeffchuppaz
Website: aimright.org
Jeff Chupp is the Executive Director at Aim Right Ministries in Phoenix, AZ, where he passionately works with at-risk students. Married to Trisha, they have three children, juggling the hustle of family life with urban youth work. As an ultrarunner, he finds peace and challenge out on the desert trails. An avid reader, Jeff is always eager to explore new ideas and viewpoints.